I set an intention during the last Project 40 (http://jungianauthenticmovement.com/project40/uncategorized/project-40-the-current-incarnation/) I participated in before leaving NYC, that I would no longer use the word ‘fear’ in my vocabulary, refusing to give it power. As such, I want to change the “fear facing” into “Inspiration Challenges.” Each day I am faced with some sort of Inspiration Challenge, an incident that forces me to dig deep in some way vs. giving power to something as yet experienced that I‘ve placed false evidence on.
It’s been a week since my last post and a lot has happened!
Mon 1/14- Inspiration Challenge: Went back to Dolphin House to speak to M, didn’t get a reduction on rent yet, but he’s including all util. and wifi (bonus he gave me a better room the next day when I moved in!) I think he will lower the price after high season, but for now it is a great price for the location.
Tues 1/15- I moved into the Dolphin House, being blessed with the front corner room! So now I have two big windows; one overlooking the front patio/yard and the second looking out on the side patio into the trees. I’m hoping to score a hammock to set up out there soon- it would be perfect! M moved the queen bed on a high platform in there and installed a great shelving unit for me. There are four of us in the house now (each with our own room,) the third guy moved in today too, a Pro-snowboarder in his 40’s from Colorado. J’s been coming down and staying in this house for 8 years. I get along great with all of them and we’ve even made a few roomie outings. Inspiration Challenge: In yoga I truly let go and was able to accomplish some really tough asana in great form. I may not have attempted them on other occasions, not wanting to fall on my face, or not fully trusting myself. Tonight, I was connected to my breath and floating on an ocean, a divine experience. Later, I had my first NYC client Skype session. I’m looking forward to working with clients this way, it went really well.
Wed 1/16- Sofiah returned today from a month’s travel. I had not yet met her, but I’d heard so much about her since Oct. She really is an amazing being, she just glows with love. I have to admit I had butterflies all day in anticipation. Inspiration Challenge: I took Sofiah’s yoga class and once again excelled as I never had before. Being surrounded by such great people, so much love and the beautiful environment is so freeing, everything seems so perfect, it’s exactly what I wanted and needed for so long. I’m so happy that I took that leap for my dream.
Thur 1/17- I was talking with my roommates in the kitchen today and started feeling really overwhelmed by a list of things that I needed to get, do, set up, etc. I made the choice right then to go practice and I found myself dancing, it literally felt like a transformation happening, I was using muscles in a way I had never felt before, I was deep at a cellular level and “POP!” Literally, just as I was saying to myself, “Oh that’s how you do it!” My lower back finally cracked, releasing all of the tension I had been feeling all week (seriously, I had been trying to crack that spot since NYC!) I skipped to the shower after. I felt like I had jumped off a cliff in leaving NYC, I had the initial moment where you leave the ground and float through the air, feeling so free. But I had been free-falling toward the water, picking up velocity all week. In the kitchen earlier I could see the water rushing up toward me….. I plunged into the depth of the ocean, hearing the splash as I submerged and water filled my ears, the bubbles, and then the perfect silence of being under, floating through space as I made my way to the surface. I emerged from the shower a mermaid, ready to take on the universe!
Fri 1/18- I spent several days last week getting settled in, unpacking, setting up my meditation space, hanging things to make it feel like MY home. Fri morning I went with my roommates up to San Isidro; which is the largest city nearby (1.5hrs north east by bus, but prob only 30-40 in a car.) The drive is beautiful, up through the mountains to an elevation of 1,385 ft, with gorgeous views of the valleys. The city is small, with 2 – 3 story buildings housing all sorts of shops, restaurants, repair stores, etc. They have some bigger grocery stores to pick up staple items in bulk, etc. I got a blender and some other things for the kitchen that I needed. I have to admit, I found it tough to navigate as there didn’t seem to be any street signs at all. But by the end of the day I started feeling more confident in the lay of the land. I think after a few more visits I’ll have it down. Inspiration Challenge: Made some more connections with local folk, and created a new resume, always a tough challenge 😉
Sat 1/19- Another fantastic yoga class this morning with Heidi, she is amazing. Then I came home to meet my roomie J and his friend for a day trip. We hopped in the maroon VW bus and took off for the mountains south of us. We went to Nuyaca (I think that was the name of it!) You leave the highway and drive up the mountain to a parking area. There is a Talapia farm, where people catch fish and then bring it to the restaurant by the parking lot for a meal. Down the hill a bit you cross the dirt road and take a short walk into the jungle where you come upon a gorgeous waterfall. There is a huge rock lodged between the two sides of the 6ft chasm and the locals jump from there. Inspiration Challenge: I wanted to do the waterfall jump, everyone else in the group thought I was nuts. I climbed up through the jungle (barefoot, that was an act of bravery in itself!) and precariously positioned myself near the edge. The view was amazing, the river before the waterfall was so idyllic. The power of the water rushing over the cliff was mesmerizing as it created a kaleidoscope of bubbles at the bottom. I had a sense of peace but my body didn’t trust me. I tried 3 times to jump, I really thought I had it, but each time my toes remained gripped to the mossy rock. After what seemed like an hour, (it was actually 5 minutes) of trying to calm myself enough to make it happen, my insides felt like Jello wiggling in terror. (Shout out to LeRoy!) I announced, “Maybe next time!” And cautiously made the trek back down to the safety of the lazy river and it’s little whirlpools and rock slides. It was a great day to remain whole and uninjured. After playing on smaller waterfalls and in tide pools for awhile, we headed back up the hill to the VW bus. Once again I was overwhelmed by the REALNESS of everything around me. It is almost impossible to even tell a white lie here, when everything around you is vibrating at such a high level it penetrates every fibre of your being, imbuing you, compelling you to live authentically too.
Sun 1/20: Happy Birthday Dad! Today I made fresh gazpacho, cooked my soaked beans, made delicious green smoothies, met with a prospective business partner to discuss some plans, Skyped with a client, caught a gorgeous sunset, picked up my laundry AND made it out for the Patriots/Ravens game (yea Ravens!!!) Inspiration Challenge: I sat in meditation for 40 min today. I haven’t done that on my own in a very long time. It felt great to ‘get back into the saddle.’ I also faced the one person I’ve met here who has been a challenge. I offered love up and remained shining the whole encounter. It felt really great and I felt them melting a bit too.
Mon 1/21 – Today I am sitting in my living room looking out over the river to the mouth wear it meets the Pacific. I am so in Love with my life!!! I miss all of you up in the US but I don’t miss the commuting, the daily grind, the American mentality. My roommates and I are planning our projects for Envision Festival which is about a month away. We’re going to set up a little stand to sell organic/raw treats, teas, beach jewelry & trinkets. It’s fun being around such creative people who are also business minded and follow through on each idea. And this afternoon I’m going to face my taxes again. After the 5 hour fiasco in December, the culmination of 2 days straight in preparation- this is my Inspiration Challenge today!